The Relationship Between Being Forgiven and Forgiving Others

Matthew 6:12-15, NASB – And forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors.  And do not lead us into temptation, but deliver us from evil.’ For if you forgive other people for their offenses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you.  But if you do not forgive other people, then your Father will not forgive your offenses.

There is a principle that has been demonstrated over and over and which all of us should recognize and begin to live into.  What you focus on, you get more of.  This extends to spiritual disciplines as well.  If you are angry much of the time, you will draw much more anger toward you.  If you act in judgmental ways, you will find yourself being judged.  If you are free with your condemnation of others, you will find yourself being condemned.    The apostle Paul said it this way:

“Don’t be misled: No one makes a fool of God. What a person plants, he will harvest. The person who plants selfishness, ignoring the needs of others—ignoring God!—harvests a crop of weeds. All he’ll have to show for his life is weeds! But the one who plants in response to God, letting God’s Spirit do the growth work in him, harvests a crop of real life, eternal life.”                      Galatians 6:7-8

So, for a moment today, I encourage you to focus on your experience of being forgiven.  The reason for that is you need that experience this as a basis to practice forgiving others.  In a surprising way that I hope you all have or will experience, the opposite is true as well.  As you practice forgiving others, your own experience of being forgiven deepens and expands.  That’s why Jesus, Paul, and forgiveness teachers in every tradition teach about the profound connection between forgiving and being forgiven.  One does not exist without the other. 

God forgives us first (Eph 4:32), then we begin to forgive ourselves and others. This leads to a deeper experience of God’s forgiveness. This empowers us to better be able to forgive others and ourselves.  The cycle repeats. The cycle repeats again.  Forgiveness grows in us and in the world.  That’s how it is supposed to work.  Forgiveness is a conspiracy of God’s scandalous love.  It turns the Old Testament notion of “eye for an eye” upside down.  That’s why I call it a revolution – a forgiveness revolution.

However, the revolution goes nowhere without our participation, without our practice.  That’s why I consider forgiveness a spiritual discipline.  One aspect of a discipline is that you do it even when you don’t feel like it because it comes from somewhere deeper than your feelings.  This conviction that it’s good for you grows as you do it – you begin to feel the benefits after you been doing it while.  This feeling reinforces and inspires you to move even deeper into the discipline – thus someone who couldn’t even run a mile at one time completes a marathon.  The practice of forgiveness is like that too.

But at first, if you’re like me, you really don’t want to do it and furthermore, it doesn’t seem like it would be good for you.   Even with the experience of BEING forgiven under your belt, turning around and forgiving others doesn’t seem attractive.  God can forgive because God is, well. . . God.  Ah, but let me plant a thought in your mind before I sign off until tomorrow. 

Question:  Remember a time when you knew that either God or someone else had forgiven you.  Connect with how that affected you physically, emotionally and spiritually.  To the extent you were able to make that connection, how are you now more ready to forgive others?

Prayer:  God, thank you for your forgiveness.  Help us begin to understand why you forgive so that we may begin to forgive as well. Amen

Prayer focus:  Pray for someone you would like to forgive.

Song:  Don Henley – The Heart of the Matter – One of the most profound songs ever written about forgiveness in my opinion.

https://www.pbs.org/video/austin-city-limits-don-henley-heart-matter/